Successes and Failures

Motivation

"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others and their views, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people...

...When it comes time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home."

- Tecumseh

As featured in Act of Valor

My Path

So it's been a long while since I've posted anything here. I apologize for my absence, but things have been high tempo the last few weeks. With this tempo has come some highs and lows in my experience at TBS. I left off back in September after we had completed the Night Land Nav PracApp and the Initial E-Course run. Land Nav had gone well for me, but the E-Course wasn't so good. Since then we have spent a lot of time in the field for Field Exercise (FEX) I and Patrol FEX, and have been tested on the Final E-Course and several written tests.

I've performed well on each written test, almost maxed the E-Course, and conducted a patrol exercise as the Patrol Leader (PL) above average to the standards expected of lieutenants at this stage of our training. All these accomplishments would fall under my highs/successes, but there are several lows/failures I've experienced throughout the same period. During FEX I (squad level attacks) and Patrol FEX we conducted more Land Navigation PracApps. What I thought was one of my strengths turned out to be one of my weaknesses. I failed both PracApps during the FEXs and one remedial event. Much of it was due to poor time management and overconfidence in terrain association. I've been learning a lot of things the hard way. One of which proper nutrition in the field. On the hike back to our barracks from FEX I I fell out as a heat casualty. The hike was only 4 miles and should have been easy, but throughout the FEX I failed to eat enough and utilize electrolyte tablets in my water sources. I fixed myself for a similar hike back from Patrol FEX and felt like I still had some fuel in the tank when we dropped our packs at the barracks.

While my failures have felt like setbacks, I have to constantly remind myself that they are simply wakeup calls. If you let the failures keep you down and in a negative mindset, you're setting yourself up to fail the next time. The hole is only as deep as you dig it, keep it shallow. If you take care of yourself and those around you, everything will fall into place. I've been trying to keep this mindset lately, especially with things that aren't under my control. The most recent event that I can relate to this is the passing of my grandfather, Edward Beatty.

I never intended for this blog to get very personal, but this is something I think would be beneficial to those pursuing a career in the military or anyone who finds themselves in the a situation where they lose a loved one and cannot be there for their family while they deal with the difficult time. My grandfather was an extraordinary man who was accomplished in so many areas and touched so many people's lives. I didn't know him as well as I had hoped, but that's just another thing out of my control. All that matters to me is that I was able to spend some time with him in the last year of his life and it meant the world to me. You can read more about him in his obituary, which my mom wrote for him. I'm proud to be his grandson and I hope that everything I'm doing makes him proud. The hardest part of this experience, which I'm sure would be for anyone in a similar situation, is the inability to be there to support my family. While I want to be there for my family, I keep telling myself that the best thing I can do is to continue kicking ass here and giving my all in everything I do. I guess this is some new motivation for everything I'm doing here.

Edward Eugene Beatty

July 5, 1928 - October 7, 2012

Do not mourn the life that has been taken, celebrate the life that has been lived.

WOD

20121011

TBS Endurance Course

1:00:47 (47 Seconds Shy of Maxing)

20121013

Obstacle Course Practice

Prep for Final Double O-Course this Week

I'll post more workouts as I get back into a garrison routine.